Samantha Says So

When I was 2 years old my dad murdered my mother. I was in her arms when this it happened, being unaware or not understanding because of the situation and my age as I got older this left me questioning why? I grew up living with my grandma and then she got really sick about age 4 I moved in with my aunt and that's who I lived with until I turned 13. I was about eight years old when God decided he would reveal to me the truth of what happened that day my family kept what happened a secret from me so they wouldn't hurt me but I needed to know the truth so I had this whole in my heart not understanding what I could fill it with so I started getting into relationships I lost my virginity at a young age I started smoking cigarettes at a young age as well I started drinking alcohol  because I started all that I moved out of my aunt's house thinking as ready to be an adult not knowing the road ahead of me would be destructive so I moved into my sisters I was still going to school but I meant the guy and he got me into smoking pot so the beginning of my addiction started when I was 13 drinking and smoking pot and shortly after that taking pills I didn't know exactly what addiction was and I also did not know that's what I was getting myself into as most of you know it runs in my family at age 15 I met another guy who got me into using methamphetamine I use this up until I was 19 years old I tried getting clean and between that time but it wasn't working it took me to lose everything I had even my sanity to realize I didn't want to live this life of addiction and in the darkness no longer God shut doors and open new ones I started my new walk into recovery on March 20th 2013 at the Union Gospel Mission women's crisis shelter and that's the Road God started me on I got into a two-year program and Ogden Hall and then I found the most amazing church family Faith Community Church I graduated Ogden Hall and moved into the roar housing program and I meant the love of my life there whom I married to now Nik Ehli I still attend the most amazing church I'm still doing all these things that I need to be doing for my recovery but the one thing that helped me and changed my life was giving my whole life over to Jesus Christ none of that would be even possible none of my story would be possible without the love of Jesus Christ in my heart I have amazing friends I have women in my life I can lean on an amazing church and amazing husband we own our own home amazing things happen when you Just Surrender it all 52 months clean and sober amen.